niv.elscorcho.org

the end.

niv@elscorcho.org (niv) — Wed, 27 May 2009 19:01:24 EST

there is no part II. there is just the end.

nothing is ever really over.

vegas: a story in 5 acts (part 1)

niv@elscorcho.org (niv) — Wed, 29 Apr 2009 14:35:45 EST

cast: me, kyle, geoff, chad
dates: april 23-26

prologue
vegas stories are good, but i've learned that the gambling itself, while fun for me and a few others, doesn't translate to stories to a greater audience. so, i'm leaving the gambling out as much as possible in these stories, though in some places it is essential. so, if you wish there was more actual gambling in these stories, let me know, but i'm going with this approach for now.

act i
landed in vegas without issue. checked in to the rio with some issue, but one of the two rooms is free so we forgave the bullshit. once the entire crew was collected and introductions had been made, we charted a course for low-limits, so as to ease us into the vegas experience. when you're looking for low limits and you're not interested in going downtown, and you hate harrah's (which you really should hate) - you head to the tropicana.

the four of us piled in a cab, only to be created by voice created by years of cigarettes and anger: "going to the whorehouse, boys?" when we politely declined and asked to go to the tropicana, we were belittled for our lack of interest in females, partying, enjoying ourselves, life, etc. this lasted for the entire ride over the to trop. we sat in silence while we were ridiculed by this trucker woman who was just hoping to goad us into going to a strip club so she could get paid. also, as soon as i got into the cab, i cut my knee on the back of the driver's seat, which led to this exchange:

chad: [saying some sort of story about something]
niv: my knee is bleeding
chad: what??
niv: just keep telling your story chad

we survived the trip to the trop, but the driver did leave a lasting impression on us.

act ii
one of the big tasks for this trip was to check out geoff's new baseball betting system. it's nothing too complicated, but it was yielding results when being tracked over the previous 2 weeks, so the 4 of us decided to give it a go with some real money. the system likes games in varying degrees, and it loved two games on friday - the mets over the nationals and the rangers over the orioles. now, the mets had santana going and the nationals are pretty terrible, so as much as the system liked the mets to win, the odds in the various books were pretty unfavorable. not worth betting on its own, unless... you go to the oldest trick in the book, the trick i used countless times to try and hit it big betting sports - before i realized that 92% return is pretty damn good - the parlay. so we parlayed the rangers over orioles and mets over nationals, planned a trip downtown with a return to mandalay bay to catch these games and the cavs-pistons game 3.

downtown was downtown. gamble-heavy. i think the whole crew likes main street station now, so jon's influence spreads more. the main thing to note is that the trip was not a win financially, and we had a weird cabby (recurring theme!) on the way down who kept telling us stories that almost went somewhere, but then abruptly ended. i honestly do not want to try to get into what this means - catch my stand-up act in a few years and you'll know what i mean.

we made it back and got nice seats without any issues. we were all a little bummed from our troubles downtown, and chad and kyle's hopes for the weekend were directly tied to the results of this parlay. the mets game was one we took for granted, and in the 3rd inning of both, the rangers and mets got on the board and we were all feeling good. this lasted all of an inning and a half, as the orioles came back in the bottom of the 4th with a 3 spot and followed up with one more in the 5th to get a 4-1 lead. the mets were crusing, up 3-1 through 6 and santana was looking dominant, but this was an afterthought to the rangers dilemma directly facing us. the rangers bats were silenced remarkably well by koji uehara, but the orioles bullpen did not have as much luck, giving up runs in the 7th and 8th to give us some hope, though a promising rally in the 8th was cut short by one of the worst at-bats i've ever seen, a five pitch breaking ball-fest that left chris davis swinging and missing. 4-3 orioles going into the 9th, with george sherrill, the orioles closer on the mound. the rangers were within striking distance, but still losing and facing a closer on the road.

jarrod saltalamacchia led off the inning with a terrible strikeout, not as badly as chris davis's rally killer in the 8th, but on 3 straight pitches. elvis andrus was up, and everyone know he stinks at hitting, and he promptly obliged by grounding out to 3rd. ian kinsler then came up, and had the count at 2-2 before fouling off a pitch away, taking a pitch up and away, and then (in retrospect, a really impressive bit of plate awareness) fouling off an excellent fastball on the lower inside corner of the strike zone. sherrill's 8th pitch of the at-bat was a slightly worse fastball, and that was enough for kinsler to send into left, bringing michael young, the ~~winning~~ go-ahead run, to the plate.

at this point, we have a little hope, but mostly the dreaded nervousness of an outcome already decided. just waiting for the confirmation.

Pickoff Attempt 1B
Pickoff Attempt 1B
Foul
Pickoff Attempt 1B
Ball

and then michael young took a pitch that gameday shows as being a little bit up, with identical break to sherrill's other fastballs, and sent it to right field. carrying, carrying. markakis is tracking it, and tracking it, and spinning around, and looking up, and there it goes, just over the fence. home run.

and the rangers are now up 5-4 with frankie francisco coming up to shut it down. we are going nuts, francisco takes care of the orioles half (roberts, markakis, huff, heart of the order) in six pitches, and our bet is looking more and more like destiny. we look through fangraphs, we laugh at the huge drop-off, and we revel in our impending victory.

at this point i get up to call jon and tell him what just happened, what luck just befell the texas rangers and us. and i glance up at the mets-nationals game in time to see austin kearns single up the middle off of francisco rodriguez in a 4-1 game. no problem. i'm telling jon what happens, and i have to stop in my tracks and abruptly (rudely, even) hang up. this is because jesus fucking flores just hit a 2 run home run off of k-rod, a hugely, hugely overrated closer who's peripherals do not line up with his 2008 performance, and thus the huge payday he received from the mets. i hang up the phone and rush back to my seat. what was i thinking, fucking up karma like that?

geoff and chad are also acutely aware of k-rod's relative weaknesses (relative to say, joe nathan, but not in an absolute world any kind of actual weakness). we watch him fall behind quickly 3-0 to alberto gonzalez, who at the time did not seem to be one whole letter away from condoning torture. after fighting back to 3-2, k-rod induced a line out to beltran and got his first out. this, it seems, was enough. also, facing a pinch-hitter and weak-hitting leadoff man for the nationals could not have hurt the situation. k-rod racked up a k of alex cintron and got anderson hernandez to fly out. and just like that, we had one a pure 2:1 parlay using geoff's now vaunted betting system. patent pending.

end of part 1

i beat the UPS guy home! and so now i have a ps3

niv@elscorcho.org (niv) — Fri, 10 Apr 2009 16:03:27 EST

the main purpose for buying a playstation 3 was simple, and actually kind of ridiculous - mlb '09 the show.

yes, i bought a $400 system and a $50 second controller for a single $60 game.

i do not regret this one bit.

mlb '09 plays a game of baseball spectacularly. the controls are the simple, intuitive ones you've been using since 'modern' baseball games came out (starting with the triple play series in the late '90s). the realism, as the ad states, is top-notch. turning a double play or getting a key strike out or even working a walk (for me, since i am swing-happy) is every bit as satisfying as ripping a single up the middle or crushing a pitch 400 feet.

and i'm saying this after 3 games against the CPU.

so the game is excellent. if you like baseball video games, i will just pass along the words that convinced me that this money would be well-spent: best game since high heat. with the obvious presentation improvements that will come after 7 years.

as to the device itself - now that i have all 3 of the current generation video game systems, i can see the clear lines they all draw. the wii is clearly for families and children. the 360 is in between - the game library begs for hardcore gamers, but the new xbox experience (nxe) is trying to be as accessible as the wii. and generally the interface is softer, with rounder corners and more pleasant colors. the ps3, though, is different. the interface could cut you, it is so sharp. the colors are muted. the device itself looks like a freaking beast. there isn't a huge emphasis on your buddies or chatting. there's just a lot of settings, a lot of being a media-viewing beast, and a lot of being a video game beast. it's a beast.

there is a part of me that each of these devices appeal to, and i am glad i have rounded out the collection, as absurd as it might be.

so i signed up for PSN, and my username is joeairbear, and feel free to add me to your buddy list. i'm also open to any video game suggestions you might have. right now i have two games on my radar:

1) littlebigplanet
2) valkyria chronicles

i am trying to avoid any FPSes on ps3, since i have plenty of life to get out of call of duty 4 and 5 on the 360. and i think if i get any new games, i have to beat a couple of ps2 games and one more 360 game before i open them up. but these are just rules.

more rants that don't fit in 140 characters

niv@elscorcho.org (niv) — Thu, 09 Apr 2009 13:18:35 EST

(this post was polished from an email i sent zach)

ups is assholes

they called me at 6am today with a recorded message about an urgent package delivery (my ps3!) that REQUIRES someone be home to sign. the recording was adamant on this vital piece of information - someone HAS to be there to sign, or i won't get my package

and then they follow that up with "no specific times are available, but your package will be delivered between 8am and 7pm"

i don't want to try and recreate a mid-90s seinfeld/romano-esque rant here, so here is where i'll end.

an open letter to andrew sheridan

niv@elscorcho.org (niv) — Tue, 07 Apr 2009 16:58:59 EST

dear andrew,

i was wrong. yo la tengo is fucking awesome. i'm sorry for any distress my unwillingness to acknowledge this may have caused you.

regards,
niv

p.s. why is it that i'm only now finally realizing how good some of these bands of my childhood were? there is an argument to be made that the beatles do require a solid 8 years of exclusive listening to really get them, but there is another argument to be made that dinosaur jr, the pixies, and yo la tengo (amongst others) should not have been ignored by me until college or later.

at&t is kind of a rip-off

niv@elscorcho.org (niv) — Thu, 02 Apr 2009 01:42:36 EST

the jump from 200 text messages ($5/month) to 1500 text messages ($15/month) has 3 levels of really terrible stuff going on, at least. i know i use that kind of device (x levels of y) a lot, so let's step through this

1a) text messaging is cheap as shit for carriers - cheaper than voice minutes. so why am i paying to use this feature? you should be begging for me to use it, so that your network load is lower.

2b) 200 texts includes sent and received. so i get to 190 on thursday, then i go to vegas and get to 289. at this point, i'm 11 away from $10 in overage fees. hence, me now having 1300 more texts for $10 more.

3c) WHAT? i get THIRTEEN HUNDRED text messages for the same amount as, if i hadn't fixed my plan, THREE HUNDRED text messages? or, if i never had a plan to begin with, ONE HUNDRED AND FIFTY text messages. it's like you acknowledge point 1a and still don't care at all.

i guess the title of this post is misleading. american cell phone plans are the rip-off.

this could have been a twitter post but twitter sucks

niv@elscorcho.org (niv) — Tue, 17 Mar 2009 03:17:42 EST

itunes dj and remote are pretty fun together. or at least, i think they could be fun together, in a scenario that didn't involve me sitting in front of my laptop, alternating between queuing up songs with my iphone and queuing up songs with jen's ipod touch and somehow finding every song i listened to in high school. seriously, look at those recent tracks. for anyone viewing this after the fact, trust me. nostalgia-fest in here.

also, i caved in and became a flickr pro. i was double-posting between the photoblog and there for the last few weeks, and the quota limitations and 200 picture limitations were pissing me off. so, i paid up, and then i joined a few groups and tried to get some people to look at my photos. it kind of worked, but it would help if you went over there and left some comments. please?

i think my left logitech speaker is about to explode. damn cheap computer speakers - these lasted me... since i worked at monster.com. and had dreams. and could still remember how college made me feel.

often times i cannot decide if i was happier then or happier now. then, i had freedom, but didn't know how to use it, and didn't understand the benefits of companionship. now, i have companionship, but responsibilities, and a full understanding of how awesome freedom is.

and of course, now i can go to vegas in a hour.

so i guess now.

and i guess this couldn't have been a twitter post.

the d300 is friggin' sweet

niv@elscorcho.org (niv) — Mon, 09 Mar 2009 01:59:14 EST

it took me about 5 minutes handling it and taking pictures for me to realize that i wanted a d300. the focusing system is awesome - 51 point focus, as opposed to the 3 points i get now. the controls are awesome - everything has a dedicated button or switch or something, and changing settings could not be easier. the weight is something to deal with, but i got used to it and it definitely feels quite sturdy. basically, i want one badly.

i also rented a sb-800 speedlight, and i was excited to check it out and do some creative lighting stuff. however, i didn't really get a chance to use it, since i didn't feel like carrying it around during my friend jon's wedding. the little i did try it out i liked, but like i said, only very little.

i don't have much more to add, review-wise. the thing's awesome. i can't wait to actually get one.

a haiku review of nudge

niv@elscorcho.org (niv) — Wed, 04 Mar 2009 01:43:21 EST

a review of nudge, a book by richard thaler and cass sunstein, in haiku form. here is an amazon link with summaries and all that. without further ado:

part 1:
the premise is good
but it does not go deeper...
which i guess is fine

part 2:
i just wanted more.
that is as good a case as
any - read this book.

fin

elscorcho's wordle

niv@elscorcho.org (niv) — Wed, 25 Feb 2009 19:39:01 EST

i'm just racking up the dumb nerd points today.

elscorcho's wordle - you'll know what it is when you look at it.

update: it's dumb to post another separate thing but it's also dumb not to share this